Erase My Secret Name

Erase My Secret Name
© Surazeus
2026 02 04

Stuck alone between the heart and the mind, 
floating in the river that swirls nowhere, 
I laugh at how often crows call my name 
as if they know how I feel about love, 
so I explain to them, nothing is real, 
but they insist on giving me mushrooms. 

My brain receives signals from singing trees 
that beam flashes of emotions in code, 
so I listen closely with attuned ears, 
but I cannot understand what they say 
though I fold my hands and attempt to pray 
as I reply with caws wild crows express. 

Clouds glow gold on horizon of my hope 
so I reach out my hand to touch their thoughts 
but I feel nothing since I am so small, 
no more than speck of dust in the vast world, 
no more than drop of water in the sea, 
though I feel the whole world inside of me. 

Electric buzz of frantic arrogance 
jolts suddenly through fail frame of my being, 
so I scream loud to crack the crystal sky 
till my voice vanishes through everywhere, 
which leaves me stranded on the roadless globe, 
laughing at how significant I feel. 

I write my thoughts in letters on the scroll 
that form words linked in writhing sentences 
to bundle flashing concepts in tight pack 
containing huge vision in fractured jars 
yet strange emotions leak out through its cracks 
so I feel confused what I really feel. 

When I sing weird emotions of my heart 
in structured patterns of conceptual thoughts 
defining rapture that expands clear scope 
involved in conscious vision of my mind, 
I feel confident my insight is clear, 
yet people stare at me, then mock my song. 

I wonder with surprise of muted shock 
what alien language outside their purview 
I must be using to express my thoughts 
that no one seems to understand my truth, 
mocking me with vicious sneers of contempt, 
though I sing with beautiful voice of faith. 

Perhaps I should erase my secret name, 
Elijah, from book of the bleeding crow, 
but when cruel people throw stones at my head 
I bat them away with my magic wand, 
then stand before tower of the mad king 
and expose his crimes with dire prophecy. 

Orpheus plays lyre of Mercury while Elijah calls down wrath of Jupiter to strike down the false prophets who praise the mad king on television news shows.