How can meta-awareness be trained? Any ideas?

So I’m trying to purposefully train my meta-awareness. One thing that’s hard about it is I want to be seen as super meta-aware and so I hide how I’m not.

My current training method: Catching flies with fly paper.

I eat breakfast outside and the flies always come for the bowl and so I hung up four fly papers in a square and then put the bowl under it when I’m done. It’s really weird to watch them get caught and die. Some get away. One got away today and immediately landed on another strip.

I’m using this like a metaphor right now.

The flies are thoughts.

The paper is attachment.

To train meta-awareness I need to be aware (not pro or con) of the attachment-ability of my mind and its thoughts as well as the space in between where the bowl of food is placed.

I sit in an interaction and wait until I think four thoughts and then I hold them meaning I don’t think about them but I don’t push them away.

I imagine that once I’m holding the four thoughts I have entered a nascent state, like I’m a baby consciousness and I tell myself there is a new action possible but that I maybe haven’t seen it so I both have to do something hard (baby grabbing cup) + something novel (Blas not acting out, Blas not just reporting feelings).

It’s really fucking hard. I kinda fall back on what I know if the stuckness lasts too long.

Anybody have tips about mistakes I could be making with this? Anybody else have ideas? Bonus points and trustability if it doesn’t sound like regurgitated Bhagavad Gita.

I’m really sure I’m meta-aware in some ways and really disidentified with how I got here, how to turn it up, etc.