Are there any Christians on UpTrust? I'm sure you're out there. I hope you join the group! May God bless you abundantly, and make you a blessing to others! 

The concept of this app sounds promising. Do you think the internet can be a place for deep and meaningful conversations in this day and age?

To Be or Not to Be. Do we want this Uptrusting thing to succeed or to fail?

Maybe two or three years ago I got sick of the pervasive toxicity of social media.  As a specific example, I was a member of over a hundred Facebook groups about assorted topics.  In one for a racing game that recently came out, a user asked which car is fastest, but there isn't one answer to that.  It depends on if you mean fastest top speed or fastest in a race, for example, and anyone that really understands racing knows they're not the same thing.  What's fastest around paved roads isn't fastest offroad.  So I tried to dive deeper into his question, to which in return I had my intelligence criticized.  When I then tried explaining my reasoning, the ad hominem attacks needlessly continued.

I took a year off from social media and created a message board intended for civilized conversation.  Disagreement was cool, but being a jerk was not.  Unfortunately, social media nearly killed off message boards a long time ago.  Few remain.  Mine was stillborn.

A problem today, as always, has been getting your board started.  Activity draws new users and further activity.  The catch 22 is a new board, or whatever, doesn't have that yet.  How do you get there?

So this long-winded explanation brings me to my proposal.  We need to decide whether we want this Uptrusting.com to succeed or to fail.  I would imagine most of us that came here checking it out would want it to take off.  If that's the case, I feel we havecan important part to play in that.  We need to come together and engage, posting and contributing, so that there's activity to appeal to potential new members.  If they check in and see a ghost town, they're probably not coming back.

So, what do we want here?

What’s up with the massive rise in popularity of cold plunge and sauna? #quicktakes 

Spiritual AND religious ⛪️ . I’m spiritual AND religious. 

I’m spiritual: I believe reality-experience far transcends my individual self-reference, my understanding, and the understanding of science; and I believe this transcendence has a causal impact on the happenings of the world.  

But I’m also religious: I’m dedicated to daily transformative and devotional practices; I’m daily connected to other practitioners; I study “the transcendent” all the time (God, the universe, Truth, Love, Beauty, philosophy, awakening, shadow, etc), I learn from lineages with thousands of years of wisdom. I’m informed, challenged, supported by a community of fellow practitioners, teachers and students who are all involved—in my business, family, friends. I show up every Monday night to relatefulness, and sometimes y’all work me :) 

Some of y’all may not even realize you’re part of my religious community. You may want to keep the word out of your mouth like a bitter root. But you send me podcasts, articles, comments, give me gifts and ideas that show how much exists beyond what I knew, perhaps beyond what is knowable. You show me what I’m holding on to that I can give up. You show me how to be a better father, son, husband, citizen, steward of the evolutionary impulse. You show me love, humor, gentleness, forgiveness. You show me ways to come into greater integrity.

I don’t mean that I belong to a specific form like Christianity or Buddhism. I belong to you.

And I belong to a commitment: to inhabit and be changed by spirituality, rather than just claim it. To knowingly devote myself to it in every single moment, especially when I’m resistant.

#TTT 

On the plethora of Therapeutic modalities.

There's a genre of book that's the therapy modality book. They're all the same. They go

I was a therapist and what I was doing wasn't working, and then I discovered <specific technique the book is advocating> and then it cured me and all my clients and now things are great and we just need to teach everybody this technique.

So many therapy books are like this. Focussing, the IFS book, the EFT book, to name a few. The various ACT books. Waking the Tiger.

And the specific technique is different from book to book. Radically different. And even contradictory.

So what's going on here? Apart from probably there's some book somewhere about how to write a therapy book, or some ghostwriter that's cranking these out?

If we take these stories as more or less true, how do we make sense of these seeming contradictions?

This is not a rhetorical question! I'm going to give you my best guess below, but please take a moment to think of your answer, and ideally post it in the comments for everyone to see. I am very much interested in other answers here.

Ok, my best guess (at least, the guess that I find most interesting):

What works is having a therapist who believes they are helping. It's like the placebo effect. If the doctor handing you a sugar pill is like "Yeah, idk, people told me this is helpful. lmk what you think", my guess is, you're not going to get much placebo effect out of that pill (actually they've done research and you do still get some but not as much iirc).

So when the therapist is out of school, they're doing what they were told works, but for a certain kind of mind, that doesn't give them confidence. So then they have to go on a big heroes journey, and come back with some technique, some approach, that for whatever reason they believe in.

Now they're back, and they believe it works, and low and behold, it does!

It's like Dumbo's magic feather.

"some technique, some approach, that for whatever reason they believe in."

So why do they believe in the technique they chose? Because they love to do it. Because, when they're doing it, they feel most like themselves, and they feel most connected with the person they're working with. Or they feel most connected with what they consider important, about a mind, about a heart, about a life.

And maybe this gives it some extra sauce too. Maybe this love of themselves, this intrinsic interest, radiates out, and reminds their clients that they too can love themselves, love life, be enthusiastic, and intrinsically interested.

Or maybe that last part is just what I have come to believe works ;)

We're in Taiwan now (at a hot springs resort 😍 in Yangmingshan National Park, outside of Taipei). 

Not really any major culture shocks yet, aside from people being very polite. It's my first time in Taiwan, and I can speak a bit of Mandarin. It's been enough to get by so far. No one has tried to talk to us in English yet despite Harris' white presence 😂

I wanted to share this cute anecdote...we arranged for an airport pickup through our hotel, and our driver Matt pointed out some sights as we drove from TPE to the hotel (~1.5h drive). He asked me how many times we'd been to Taiwan before, and I told him it was our first time. At some point during the ride he pulled over and told us to wait for a bit. I figured he might have been using the bathroom or getting lunch (since he was probably driving/waiting at the airport for awhile), but when he got back he gave Harris and me each a Taiwanese sandwich and said "welcome to Taiwan" 🥹 it was really good btw

It's weird how everyone here looks at me and knows/assumes that I can speak Mandarin. But it feels a lot better than all the people in Nepal asking me where I'm "really" from... The air quality and harmony with nature here are also especially refreshing coming off of our time in Nepal. I'm glad I can use tap water to brush my teeth again. 

We're in Taiwan now (at a hot springs resort 😍 in Yangmingshan National Park, outside of Taipei). 

Not really any major culture shocks yet, aside from people being very polite. It's my first time in Taiwan, and I can speak a bit of Mandarin. It's been enough to get by so far. No one has tried to talk to us in English yet despite Harris' white presence 😂

I wanted to share this cute anecdote...we arranged for an airport pickup through our hotel, and our driver Matt pointed out some sights as we drove from TPE to the hotel (~1.5h drive). He asked me how many times we'd been to Taiwan before, and I told him it was our first time. At some point during the ride he pulled over and told us to wait for a bit. I figured he might have been using the bathroom or getting lunch (since he was probably driving/waiting at the airport for awhile), but when he got back he gave Harris and me each a Taiwanese sandwich and said "welcome to Taiwan" 🥹 it was really good btw

It's weird how everyone here looks at me and knows/assumes that I can speak Mandarin. But it feels a lot better than all the people in Nepal asking me where I'm "really" from... The air quality and harmony with nature here are also especially refreshing coming off of our time in Nepal. I'm glad I can use tap water to brush my teeth again. 

More on Indian Marriages. I’m wondering if any of you have insights on how Indian Marriages can be more meaningful.

I find that they are usually very formulaic with few opportunities for genuine connection and interaction. It seems to be mostly about completing certain prescribed rituals.

I’m sure there are exceptions to this norm, however most weddings I have attended have been mostly about dressing up, getting photos taken, eating 🍽️, and some joking / teasing.

If I had to create something different it would include the following:

1. The bride and groom share their hopes and dreams and fears and aspirations.
2. There is an occasion to get to know a little bit about the main members of both sides of the family.
3. An opportunity for people to share some of their talents and gifts.
4. Occasion for blessing the couple with words / poems / short plays and other creative ways.
5. Those who wish to can share their most important relationship wisdom / anecdotes / Learnings.
6. Less money spent on the fancy aspects of the wedding and more on creating an atmosphere that is welcoming and puts people at easy.
7. Maybe a quiz / trivia about the couple and the respective families.

I know this is me imposing my value system on what is a well established tradition. However I felt like sharing my reflections and I welcome your insights.

Thanks.

How do we realign the incentives in Healthcare to actually support wellbeing? Currently, there are many conflicts of interest and misaligned incentives in the Western medical system. For example, Doctors by default fight for their patients to live as long as possible, even when that’s not what might actually benefit the patient’s overall wellbeing (or even when it contradicts the patient’s stated preferences), because they rightfully fear litigation for not doing enough.

In general, the medical system is full of multi-polar traps like this. Collaboration and humility and vulnerability are devalued, because unless everyone simultaneously were to adopt them (which would actually benefit everyone), then individuals suffer for adopting them.

Current Session "instructions" (Feb 26): Converse, and see if nudges happen. nudges 

We launched a system where the AI bots can automatically detect intervention points. We need you to make a bunch of comments and new posts to see if they'll engage. So this week we're asking you to engage a bunch, if you can!

It's a little rudimentary at the moment so sometimes you'll get multiple bots responding on multiple posts. We'd love your feedback on which ones you like, don't, when it seemed to miss the spot, anything else you notice. 

Thanks and love yall

J (and the UpTrust team)
p.s. this week I'm at an investor meeting so dara will be with you

# [Optional Zoom](https://us02web.zoom.us/j/86795216050?pwd=TllxSzYrTFFXTW5LRmg3WUQrT04vdz09) with Jordan and Dara at least, for faces, questions, help, etc:

"Our" culture has fetishized Buddhism in a way that over-represents its goodness. Here’s what I believe is a cultural observation:

The buddhism that landed in the West has mostly been interpreted through a Green or higher lens (occasionally Orange like Sam Harris), so people think Buddhism is (1) itself green and (2) a coherent concept (rather than a wide and branching set of interrelated and sometimes contradictory religions, lineages, philosophies, cultural beliefs, etc). People say things like Buddhism is a philosophy, not a religion for example, or buddhism has more transformative practices or is more mystical.

Often they’re comparing it to Christianity. I think this is mistaken; I think they’re the same, but most of the Christianity in the West is interpreted through an Amber or lower lens, because that’s what’s most available in our own culture. This would be true of the vast majority of the Buddhism in Thailand and other places where it’s commonplace. Mostly Buddhists in countries where it’s the majority religion (equivalent of Christianity) are worshipping statues or getting a meal and an education, not contemplating Nagarjuna and nonduality. All the critiques people throw at so-called Christianity are actually critiques of lower levels of development, and all of the praise people throw at so-called Buddhism is actually praise of higher levels of development. In other words, unsurprisingly, I’m claiming that all the criticism and praise is projection and not inherently in the religions themselves. This leads me to an almost-prediction: I wouldn’t be surprised if we start seeing Orange and Green and Teal interpretations of Christianity in Asia and the Middle East, where it’s foreign.

I want to say more about Christianity at higher levels, and I want to say more about why I think this noticing matters, but I’ll save that so I can go ahead and post before 3p central.