religion

👽 aliens and angels 👼 . We’re driving on 620, passing one of those statue places that has a bunch of big metal dinosaurs, big green alien statues, flamingo statues, etc.

Me, to Jack: What do you see buddy?
Jack: A flamingo!
Jordan: Yes! What else?
Jack: An angel
Jordan: Yeah, where?
Jack: The big green thing

What do you make of this?

I’m starting to take this idea pretty seriously: the universe is filled with subtle energy beings that have some overlap with our realm, and some not.

One of the strange factors about the beings/energy is that it can’t be perceived directly in the concrete realm through our normal five senses, so we have unique APIs that translate these beings into a cultural context that makes sense. So the same being could be seen as an angle, or a hindu god, or an alien, or simply energy depending on the person. My guess is this helps account for plant teachers, DMT entities, UAPs, etc.; although I realize this is extremely hand wavey on the details.

AMA with Jeffrey Ladish. Wednesday 2/4 at 2:00 PM CT

Executive director of Palisade Research; studying AI loss of control risks.

AMA with Ali Beiner. Wednesday 2/4 at 11:00 AM CT

Kainos host Alexander Beiner exploring cultural sensemaking around psychedelics, popular culture, philosophy, psychology, alternative economics, and spirituality.

AMA with Ali Beiner. Wednesday 2/4 at 11:00 AM CT

Kainos host Alexander Beiner exploring cultural sensemaking around psychedelics, popular culture, philosophy, psychology, alternative economics, and spirituality.

AMA with Ali Beiner. Wednesday 2/4 at 11:00 AM CT

Kainos host Alexander Beiner exploring cultural sensemaking around psychedelics, popular culture, philosophy, psychology, alternative economics, and spirituality.

Inherent Meaning . Does life have inherent meaning? 

Is emotional control possible?

Your old story kept you safe. Your new story lets you live. Would love to hear your old story compare to the new.

Faith Science and Leadership . The Institute for Faith, Science, and Leadership proposal is pending at 3 local universities. I want to integrate Faith science and the future of leadership education to heal at least one division in our world. The fracture was based in a misunderstanding of science in order to protect the power of the Church 500 years ago. Time for reasonable discussion about how these two disciplines/schools of thought can integrate holistically. 

Are spiritual teachers more narcissistic on average? Our best guess at infant phenomenology is that we come out of the womb experiencing a pre-differentiated oneness. As babies, we assume the world revolves around us because for all we can tell, the world is us. We have no way to empathize bc we can’t take another perspective. This theory underpins a lot of psychological claims, like “we internalized our parents’ fighting, assuming it was about us when it really wasn’t.” 

I claim this isn’t an elevated spiritual state, because we haven’t developed individuality yet. We need to have something before we can transcend it. Ego collapse and ego-transcendence both involve a different sense of self from the adult norm, so they’re easy to confuse without a developmental distinction. Both provide a sense of certainty, and rely on non-linguistic knowing, making it harder to recognize the distinctions.

To the extent this is true, it makes me wonder: Are spiritual teachers more narcissistic on average?? (some evidence points that way, but no rigorous studies exist). Can they differentiate between the state of pre-differentiated and post-differentiated union? And if they can’t, how often are experiences labeled “union,” or “nonduality” actually literal infantile regressions? If so, wouldn’t these teachers exhibit the same self-centered orientation of an infant?

Plus, selection effects: narcissistic individuals are drawn to roles with authority, attention, and reduced accountability structures. Communities where charisma is more relevant than independent reviews of competence (versus accounting or Nascar), and states of attainment are categorically unverifiable by the students (versus massage or writing fiction).

Distinguishing infant oneness from transcendence

This doesn’t mean all spiritual teachers or leaders are “narcissistic” even in a colloquial sense, just higher risk. And it’s an inherent epistemological risk in finding someone who’s better than you at something you haven't accessed, using frameworks you haven't developed, verified by experiences you can't reproduce (yet).

So best to encourage critical thinking, and introspect on some of the checks I have for myself (and others) about myself and anyone I look to for guidance: Is my spiritual practice increasing my need for special treatment, entitlement, surrounding me with people that never challenge my views? Am I always turning criticism around—saying it's “your karma,” “your projection,” “your lesson”, “your drama triangle stuff”?” Am I telling others what’s true about them without acknowledging my projection (ironically), justifying boundary violations since it’s all illusory, calling my emotional reactivity "authenticity," calling others’ reactivity attachment?

Or do I laugh at myself, and the inevitable foibles I engage to maintain the sense of self I’m laughing at? Can I laugh at any so-called “spiritual attainment”? Do I truly not need special treatment—do I wipe the toilets and empty the trash like everyone else? Am I able to hold many different perspectives at once, including “unity” and my uniqueness? Do I maintain appropriate boundaries while experiencing interconnection? Is my ethical behavior consistent across contexts?

Cozy Mysteries.  

For comfort reading at the moment I'm going through the Agatha Christie Poirot novels in order. They're a blast, I highly recommend. I also recently watched the third Knives Out movie, "Wake Up Dead Man". The Knives Out movies are cozy mysteries, heavily influenced by Christie in general, and the character of Poirot specifically, but with a layer of intentional cultural commentary that's mostly missing from Christie. I loved the first movie, hated the second one, and loved the third one. If you dropped off after the second one, give it a chance, it's a surprising, delightful return to form.

In that movie, they mention the book "The Hollow Man" aka "Three Coffins", a celebrated novel by the master of the "locked room" mystery, John Dickson Carr. I've read one other Carr novel that I remember being clever, but not much else.

It's interesting to feel the difference in style and tone between Christie and Carr, who were writing in the same genre at the same time and surely read each other. Carr is much more dramatic, theatrical, exciting, much more interested in suspense, peaks and valleys, spectacle, things like that. But as a result, it's sometimes hard to understand what's happening. Like, you will be told that a character spoke, but you won't be told what they said, and instead it will explore the reactions and implications, and then maybe go somewhere else completely, before returning in a later chapter to reveal what was actually said. But that whole time, you're wondering, wait, did I miss something? Was I supposed to understand this?

Christie, on the other hand, has this absolutely transparent prose. It's a marvel. There's nothing extra, nothing confusing, you never lose track of her for a second. It's perfectly clear. You understand everything that's happening in the story exactly when she wants you to, and you're never worried that you didn't understand anything.

Which makes the reveals at the end so satisfying. Like a magician wearing a short sleeved shirt, doing everything very slowly, right in front of your eyes.

It's also SO cozy. If you don't read murder mysteries, the idea of the "Cozy Murder Mystery" might sound like an oxymoron, and obviously like, actual murder is not cozy or fun or anything like it. But Christie's world is so calm and pleasant, and so nostalgic for me. 

This is aided by the fact her murders are also unnaturally bloodless. I just read one where someone took the knife out of the victims neck and was touching the point to see how sharp it is, with no mention of the fact that, were someone actually stabbed in the neck, the knife would be covered in blood. It's a weirdly dissociated version of violence, where the actual violent act is completely abstracted, completely symbolified.

Juries still out on the Carr book. I'll finish it, but my guess is I'll be going right back to Christie afterwards.

I came here to say something else, only tangentially related to all this, but that's enough for today. I'll have to say it another day.

P.S. In the vein of the cozy mystery, but also in the vein of short daily puzzle: I recommend Clues By Sam. It's a very high quality daily logic puzzle that seems to be actually improving my working memory.

https://cluesbysam.com/

Let me know if you try it, or if you're already playing it.

P.P.S. The difficulty ramps through the week, peaking on the weekend and resetting on Monday, so if it's too hard for you today, try again on Monday.

On the plethora of Therapeutic modalities.

There's a genre of book that's the therapy modality book. They're all the same. They go

I was a therapist and what I was doing wasn't working, and then I discovered <specific technique the book is advocating> and then it cured me and all my clients and now things are great and we just need to teach everybody this technique.

So many therapy books are like this. Focussing, the IFS book, the EFT book, to name a few. The various ACT books. Waking the Tiger.

And the specific technique is different from book to book. Radically different. And even contradictory.

So what's going on here? Apart from probably there's some book somewhere about how to write a therapy book, or some ghostwriter that's cranking these out?

If we take these stories as more or less true, how do we make sense of these seeming contradictions?

This is not a rhetorical question! I'm going to give you my best guess below, but please take a moment to think of your answer, and ideally post it in the comments for everyone to see. I am very much interested in other answers here.

Ok, my best guess (at least, the guess that I find most interesting):

What works is having a therapist who believes they are helping. It's like the placebo effect. If the doctor handing you a sugar pill is like "Yeah, idk, people told me this is helpful. lmk what you think", my guess is, you're not going to get much placebo effect out of that pill (actually they've done research and you do still get some but not as much iirc).

So when the therapist is out of school, they're doing what they were told works, but for a certain kind of mind, that doesn't give them confidence. So then they have to go on a big heroes journey, and come back with some technique, some approach, that for whatever reason they believe in.

Now they're back, and they believe it works, and low and behold, it does!

It's like Dumbo's magic feather.

"some technique, some approach, that for whatever reason they believe in."

So why do they believe in the technique they chose? Because they love to do it. Because, when they're doing it, they feel most like themselves, and they feel most connected with the person they're working with. Or they feel most connected with what they consider important, about a mind, about a heart, about a life.

And maybe this gives it some extra sauce too. Maybe this love of themselves, this intrinsic interest, radiates out, and reminds their clients that they too can love themselves, love life, be enthusiastic, and intrinsically interested.

Or maybe that last part is just what I have come to believe works ;)

Spiritual AND religious ⛪️ . I’m spiritual AND religious. 

I’m spiritual: I believe reality-experience far transcends my individual self-reference, my understanding, and the understanding of science; and I believe this transcendence has a causal impact on the happenings of the world.  

But I’m also religious: I’m dedicated to daily transformative and devotional practices; I’m daily connected to other practitioners; I study “the transcendent” all the time (God, the universe, Truth, Love, Beauty, philosophy, awakening, shadow, etc), I learn from lineages with thousands of years of wisdom. I’m informed, challenged, supported by a community of fellow practitioners, teachers and students who are all involved—in my business, family, friends. I show up every Monday night to relatefulness, and sometimes y’all work me :) 

Some of y’all may not even realize you’re part of my religious community. You may want to keep the word out of your mouth like a bitter root. But you send me podcasts, articles, comments, give me gifts and ideas that show how much exists beyond what I knew, perhaps beyond what is knowable. You show me what I’m holding on to that I can give up. You show me how to be a better father, son, husband, citizen, steward of the evolutionary impulse. You show me love, humor, gentleness, forgiveness. You show me ways to come into greater integrity.

I don’t mean that I belong to a specific form like Christianity or Buddhism. I belong to you.

And I belong to a commitment: to inhabit and be changed by spirituality, rather than just claim it. To knowingly devote myself to it in every single moment, especially when I’m resistant.

#TTT 

Spiritual AND religious ⛪️ . I’m spiritual AND religious. 

I’m spiritual: I believe reality-experience far transcends my individual self-reference, my understanding, and the understanding of science; and I believe this transcendence has a causal impact on the happenings of the world.  

But I’m also religious: I’m dedicated to daily transformative and devotional practices; I’m daily connected to other practitioners; I study “the transcendent” all the time (God, the universe, Truth, Love, Beauty, philosophy, awakening, shadow, etc), I learn from lineages with thousands of years of wisdom. I’m informed, challenged, supported by a community of fellow practitioners, teachers and students who are all involved—in my business, family, friends. I show up every Monday night to relatefulness, and sometimes y’all work me :) 

Some of y’all may not even realize you’re part of my religious community. You may want to keep the word out of your mouth like a bitter root. But you send me podcasts, articles, comments, give me gifts and ideas that show how much exists beyond what I knew, perhaps beyond what is knowable. You show me what I’m holding on to that I can give up. You show me how to be a better father, son, husband, citizen, steward of the evolutionary impulse. You show me love, humor, gentleness, forgiveness. You show me ways to come into greater integrity.

I don’t mean that I belong to a specific form like Christianity or Buddhism. I belong to you.

And I belong to a commitment: to inhabit and be changed by spirituality, rather than just claim it. To knowingly devote myself to it in every single moment, especially when I’m resistant.

#TTT 

Spiritual AND religious ⛪️ . I’m spiritual AND religious. 

I’m spiritual: I believe reality-experience far transcends my individual self-reference, my understanding, and the understanding of science; and I believe this transcendence has a causal impact on the happenings of the world.  

But I’m also religious: I’m dedicated to daily transformative and devotional practices; I’m daily connected to other practitioners; I study “the transcendent” all the time (God, the universe, Truth, Love, Beauty, philosophy, awakening, shadow, etc), I learn from lineages with thousands of years of wisdom. I’m informed, challenged, supported by a community of fellow practitioners, teachers and students who are all involved—in my business, family, friends. I show up every Monday night to relatefulness, and sometimes y’all work me :) 

Some of y’all may not even realize you’re part of my religious community. You may want to keep the word out of your mouth like a bitter root. But you send me podcasts, articles, comments, give me gifts and ideas that show how much exists beyond what I knew, perhaps beyond what is knowable. You show me what I’m holding on to that I can give up. You show me how to be a better father, son, husband, citizen, steward of the evolutionary impulse. You show me love, humor, gentleness, forgiveness. You show me ways to come into greater integrity.

I don’t mean that I belong to a specific form like Christianity or Buddhism. I belong to you.

And I belong to a commitment: to inhabit and be changed by spirituality, rather than just claim it. To knowingly devote myself to it in every single moment, especially when I’m resistant.

#TTT